Mother of god, chill dude!

Whoever can figure out what this dude is on will win 10 internets! The following is what is believed to be said during this guys' rant:

i'm gonna / (friend) your bitch? / ohhhh buddy you were the most amazing bitch of all time! yeah! / (friend) sam pots? / yeah sam pots / i love you / i wanna make your babies into fuckin little fuckin candice worms with fuckin / little bernassi who i was thinking of somebody else / i forgot her name wtf's her name / or that cat bitch one of those other girls who chill at the grove / and i don't even know and all / i don't know where the fuck you came from yo / wtf you fuckin trip me out motherfucker / you wanna piece of me? / (illegible) / alalallalalala / WOO!